i cant stop,hahaha

i believe i am addicted,hahahaha.seems  i cant stop coming here,even when,or actually,especially when,i have no real idea of what i am going to write about.oh,oh,gotta turn the stereo on,yup,i know its hard to believe but the tv is actually on.i dont even know why i turned it on but kinda got caught up watching ncis and then finished reading the last book in the larsson triology about the girl with the dragon tattoo.so lets see whats going on here,went and did a floor at no charge just buffed it out,simply because it felt good,in addition,no denial want it to look good as i am going to work on getting some work down the street.i really enjoyed not only the work but the companionship of the people working and talking with a few of the customers.it was usually just a hello or something of that nature but,it being friday,most were in a good mood,some regulars came in also,so it was pretty good.talking about work,ran into a situation last night,that has me kinda stymied.i had a great time so no problem there,however in conversation with store clerk learned customer had misinformed me in regard to the reason previously scheduled work was canceled.while i was doing the job,for which i do need the money,i debated about the situation.not having many contracts,when they are scheduled,the money is usually already in play,at least in my mind.this being before christmas,i had spent the money,many times over,hahaha,at any rate he cancelled the work till future date.now my price had already been set,according to time in between jobs,when he informed me we could not do ,due to an employee situation,i kept everything the same as i did not feel it was his fault.then i discovered that had not been the case,after i started work.i did not allow that to keep me from doing a good job,actually i did a better job,not only because i was enjoying myself,i also was debating if i wanted to continue working with someone of that ilk,under these circumstances,my belief is let them know what they lost,or at risk to lose.the money for the work i have not bothered with,as i am still in self debate,and personally,am of the thought i don't care.i know,seems slightly crazy huh,well the truth is i would have just stayed home anyway,i actually enjoyed myself,and its kinda of a moral thing.i am probably,gonna need the money,but if i see him,to get it,i know i will confront him,and if he b/s me i don't know how i would react.but oh well it will work itself out eventually,hahaha,life in a floor mans world heheheh,too many chemicals heheeee.good tunes coming out now,dance music for sure,we fell in love in a hopeless place,has nice bass,good dance beat.so whats next,came home,amn i love coming home,there is nothing like coming home to your own space.dose not matter if there's dishes in the sink,or if its not immaculate,its yours,a sanctuary from all bad things,the tent you built with sheets when you were a child,that castle in the books when you were reading king arthurs tales,the cocoon of your mothers arms,its embrace,like a lovers caress,sanity,calm,that place you are most likely to be uninhibited,free and secure in its womb.yup,i am a homebody,now i always come home and then think of other places,like dancing,going shopping,errands to run,then i just enjoy being here so much i kinda end up doing nothing,ok,maybe i procrastinate,but it feeels so good,enveloped in this familiar shell,all my toys near at hand,computer,tv ,radio,books,and not having to go out of myself,brrrrrrrrrr,comfort.so,where were we?arriving in my palace,hahaha,i ended up checking my facebook,real proud that michelle,step daughter,got accepted by a school she was trying so hard for,have you noticed how the social structure is changing so drastically?seems,hell,its true,we have or are losing the desire or ability to carry on conversations about our lives,especially with those closest to us.it saddens me to seee such a dependency on interaction with facebook,twitter,or other forms of so called  mechanical form.its as if the world has forgotten the physical interaction which keeps us healthy,only engaging when necessary,secluding us unwittingly,similar to myself right here.i love this,attempt at sharing my thoughts,pretending to be a writer,hahaha,but i miss long conversations,the verbal banter amongst a group of friends,or the feeling of contentment when people gather together for the joy of being together.today a family can be living in the same house,not seeing one another except for trips to kitchen or bathroom.everything is wrapped up in the modern experience of tv,and computer,sad,what happened to us?i have had a computer for more then half my life,tv all my life,never have i understood this tendacy of todays world,to make them more important then the humans who created these things.older,saddened,actually who dosent miss the human touch,glad i am old enough to know what i am missing,the dissolution of the interplay of humanity's soul,the loss of a mothers first holding of her child,lovers who whisper into each others ears,laughter of family at a shared remembrance.the young one leaving home,for the first time,the pain of those who raised them,the knowledge they know of journeys the young one has begun,the pains of growing apart from,is this what mankind is experiencing or have we begun to become callused,insulated by our artificial world,for you i have no answer,i know that without the mingling of others,i am less then,so DO YOU FEEL THE LOVE,later,me