Thursday, July 4, 2013

4th of july

         Happy 4th of July, Independence Day, yesterday i made a post and i will be the first to admit it was not pretty.Today, has been a rather wonderful day , and i had to stop myself from going back to read it.I know that whatever i posted was real and though the desire to edit it , maybe even delete it, is here, i can not undo it or my blog would be a lie.Todays good fortunes, do not eradicate yesterdays pains, or we would be like computers,with the ability to reformat our minds and start anew.Irregardless of the pain, cost,I would rather be the human i am. Of course i wish i would learn better from my mistakes, but i guess thats part of me being myself.
         It was a great day, i watched Madison and Samantha, we played in the rain,danced a little bit, washed dishes,checked out some you tube videos,and talked to Donna over the phone. It rained like crazy, flooded the street,and attempted to flood the house.I took the pump from the pond and used it to drain the water from the front door,hehehehe. The children and i played in the rain, got soaked,but i did drape the kids in towels,and they loved the freedom of it all. Ok., I did too, no lie, hehehe. After the kids went home, Donna came in from work, the roads were shut down all over the place so it took a while, then we went ,checked on my mother, at her insistence, as i felt someone would call me if there was a problem.Then when there was no answer at the door, we had a neighbor with a key, open up the place,to find out she was not home, but out grocery shopping for her dogs birthday on saturday. It takes all kinds, hehehe, and she is definitely as much an individual as i am. My wife busted her ass at work today, a lot of people at work, had to go home early as they lived in areas were the roads were being completely blocked off, denying them access to home.I did offer to go over and help out but she was concerned over no one being at house if they shut the road down. As broke as we are, i offered to take her out for a bite ,and it was funny,we tried being cheap, but every place was closed, finally we ended up at the end of our street and she ordered some crab claws and chicken,42 bucks with tip, but she definitely deserved the reward for all she went through today. I did ask her to thaw something out for tomorrow ,so we did not have to eat out though,hehehe. The smile on her face as she devoured those crab claws made it all worthwhile. Then i brushed her hair and she passed out. I had hoped to go to the fireworks but they were canceled till tomorrow, and it was a rare night, she had nothing to complain about for a change.
         I was watching CNBC last night,the "QUEEN OF VERSAILLES" came on, a documentary about David Siegel and his wife. He built and owns Westgate Resorts, one of the largest privately owned time share companies in the world.It was a mixed story starting with him being one of the super rich, falling in bad straits financially ,and then the discovery thru the web, of his turning it all back around. Watching and researching it all made me think of my own story, nowhere near his financially, but the sinking of all i held dear, gave me reason to believe there was some similarity.Then tonight i was watching the new show called Hero, though no hero myself, i wished that i was in the show,if just to see how i held up morally,.Strange, i know,and no lie the money part is nice too.I know I seem to to give the appearance that life is all black and white, that is not true , there is a lot of grey,my problem or what bothers me is when people make statements ,or judgements , based on beliefs they state, then turn it around as a matter of more convenience for  themselves.
      My greatest fear,is too disappoint myself, through lack of effort or procrastination, I know this my worst enemy and it drives me nuts.If given a goal by others i will always overcome any obstacle, in order to accomplish it,my biggest weakness is self.
     well i am going to try to add some videos here to demonstrate my day and if it works i will add some to previous posts, and future ones, hehehehe.Have a great day, be grateful for what we have and may love be with you, Marino.

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